The Reciprocity of Confession and Forgiveness

Eustaquio Carrasco, artist

Imaginative Prayers from the Original Language of Jesus, Part VI

A Lenten Series

For a couple of years now, I’ve begun most days by praying from the Book of Common Prayer (BCP). When I started this practice, one of the first things I noticed was that morning prayer began with confession. I’ll be honest. I initially felt irritated by that. It seemed to suggest to me that before I could get down to the business of being with God, I had to clean myself up—a belief I’d previously been taught and trying to break free from for years. 

My angsty response to beginning with confession led to some angsty prayer. As I shared with God my annoyance, at some point a thought came to mind: “Confession isn’t for God’s sake. It’s for mine.” It then occurred to me that God doesn’t need me to confess what God already knows. I need to confess for myself, as a way of realigning my heart and life with God’s heart for the world. 

What was also new and notable to me is that the prayer of confession in the BCP uses the plural pronoun “we.” 

“We confess that we have sinned against you in thought, word, and deed, by what we have done and by what we have left undone. We have not loved you with our whole heart. We have not loved our neighbor as ourselves. We are truly sorry and humbly repent.” 

Confessing “our” sins was not part of my previous Christian tradition. I practiced personal confession, or confessing and asking forgiveness when I wronged someone. But I didn’t know what it meant to confess our sins, the sins of humanity. I’m also starting to understand why this is important. 

To confess on behalf of all with whom I share this planet, the “we” who are living together in this moment in history, helps me not turn my neighbor or enemy into the “other.” Rather than lift myself above those I disagree with, above those who are clearly violating the ethics of Jesus, I confess my sins and theirs. Through this act of confession, I am humbled to admit that I, too, have sinned. Confessing corporate sin helps to undermine the temptation to divide humanity into "us vs. them."  

That being said, it seems essential to make clear what confession is NOT:

• Confessing “our” sins does not minimize or negate the wrong of sin. 

• Confessing “our” sins doesn’t deny, justify, or neutralize the impact of sin. 

• Confessing “our” sins doesn’t replace the need to oppose sin. 

In Part VI of this Lenten series, Imaginative Prayers from the Original Language of Jesus, the topic of confession shows up in the sixth line of the Lord’s Prayer, 

“Forgive us our debts, as we forgive our debtors.”

The Tie that Binds 

The root word in Aramaic for forgive (wa/shboqlan) can mean to return to its original state or to untangle. Perhaps Jesus had in mind the Year of Jubilee when all debts were erased and all land returned to its original owners. (Leviticus 25:10-17) He was accentuating the critical nature of letting go, of unbinding the conflicts and contracts that tie us in knots to one another. 

It’s important to notice the reciprocity of confession and forgiveness in this line. We start first with confession, asking God to “forgive us our debts.” This is an important starting point because it places us squarely in our human experience, reminding us that we, too, are in need of forgiveness. Then we can move toward forgiving “our debtors” from a posture of humility. We can look at them eye-to-eye, as fellow transgressors, rather than looking down on them from a position of moral superiority. 

Today is Good Friday, a solemn day when we remember Jesus Christ crucified on the cross. One of his last acts, his last utterances before he died, was to pray for his perpetrators' forgiveness. “Father, forgive them, for they do not know what they are doing” (Luke 23:34). In this final demonstration of grace, Jesus underscores that confession and forgiveness are key instruments of God’s healing of our relationships, the essential acts of a forgiven people.  

Breath and Body Prayer: 

Breath in: Loose the cords of mistakes binding us, 

Breath out: As we release the strands we hold of others’ guilt.